I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
