i think my mom watched the whole time
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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