yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
