I need help removing her.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
