Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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