I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
just tell him i said nine months
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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