i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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