Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize