she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
