I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
operation harelip BJ is a go
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
