did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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