remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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