There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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