We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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