My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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