margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
