I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
this is an emotional support booty call
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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