super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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