i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
