On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
