guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
