I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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