Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
