So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
