There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
