Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
