You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Me too!
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
