Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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