if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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