Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
foreskin is a definite game changer
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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