Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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