There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
