Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
