I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Randomize
