I must be too annoying 4 u.
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
