you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
