Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
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