And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize