Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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