i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
