You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
