Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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