Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
