dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
