OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
