We won't sleep together?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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