By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
