he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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