Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
this just has baby written all over it
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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