Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
