**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
