Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
